Sharknado 2 premiered on the SyFy channel Last night (Wednesday July 30th) and boy did it leave jaws dropped. Flaunting a star studded cast lead by Mark McGrath of 90’s hit band Sugar Ray, Vivica Fox, and Tara Reid. It became apparent that this was the hot movie to be apart of this past film season.

Now incase you aren’t familiar with the premise of Sharknado one, there is a tornado, and there are hundreds of perturbed sharks in the swirl of all different species, aimlessly biting and killing innocent victims they come in contact with. At no point in either film is this phenomenon explained,  it’s easier to just accept it, and figure it’s global warming. The flying shark action is as thrilling to watch as it is to see what random actor is going to waltz on screen next, and these aren’t discrete cameo’s were talking here (except Perez Hilton, he’s tough to recognize because well, he shouldn’t be famous)

Among the more awesome cameos were breathing legends like Andy Dick, Biz Markie, Kelly Osborne, Kurt Angle (who plays a no-neck-NYPO) and thin Al Roker, who plays himself, with a bit of expertise in the area of Sharknados. Don’t call them shark storms when Thin Al is around.

I wonder if Al being a pro weatherman had any problem with this ridiculous forecast brought to you by the weather channel

2 inches of shark per hour, wow that’s more than usual.

Cameo’s like Al not taking guff from nobody give this movie credibility and depth, now just shamelessly throwing in a Subway advertisement in the first 20 minutes of the film shows a strong partnership with Subway Restaurants, but doesn’t help it’s chance with the academy.

And just for that, you, “guy waiting for the train” are going to get eaten. Let’s watch this guy get eaten by a shark, looks like his day really bites now.

The badass-ness of this film does not go undershot. With any likeable character being a candidate for death by shark-attack when you least expect it, they bring the heat when you need it. Like this awesome slow-mo rock&roll scene with a sword.. a sword. Also notice the shark tooth necklace in the shot, pure cinematography.

Incredible. And in true Sharknado fashion as soon as they do something cool, it needs to be countered with something to remind you, that you are in fact watching the SyFy channel.

The whole city is resting on this guy plans, and he is all shoulders. But wait, isn’t this a badass action flick? Yup, so here’s that speech you wanted, a regular William Wallace with a chainsaw and a shark flying at him. (Greatest Speech Ever, Caesar-esque really) Given to all 19 people of the City of New York.

And here’s a picture of Kelly Osborne popping up as flight attendant.

Kelly Osbore sharknado

The Cast List

Relevant people that I have assembled with my own eyes from Sharknado 2, are as follows.

Tara Reid

Vivica Fox

Mark McGrath of Sugar Ray

Judah Friedlander

Kurt Angle

Downtown Julie Brown

Billy Ray Freakin Cyrus

Andy Dick

Perez Hilton

Matt Lauer

Biz Markie

Kelly Osborne

Al Roker

Jared fogle from Subway

The Main Man – Fin

No actor is less recognizable than the main character of this film. In real life his name is Ian Ziering. In his Starring role as hero macho man character, Fin (yes that is the Sharknado humor) he steals the show with ridiculously basic one liners, and damnit if this doesn’t blast his career into stardom, nothing will.

Shot On Location

For the New York fan, the scenery of this movie is great. About fifteen minutes actually takes place in Citi Field and they use footage of an actual Mets game, like I don’t even understand why. Maybe just to fill time in the movie, it was only about 1:20. But a strong 1:20. The empire state building is utilized for the final scene of the movie when two Sharknados are about to collide, but instead, essentially, the building gets in the way, and electricity flies everywhere. It makes no sense to us regular people, but hey neither do magnets.

One Really Important Last Note

The film is technically called “Sharknado 2 The Second One” which definitely is hilarious, but I refuse to write that over and over.

 

There you have it folks, everything you need to know about Sharknado 2 The Second One. Overall rating, for what this film was going for, with that title and everything? 1.9/2. Yeah an absolute homerun, slam dunk, goodnight, thanks for the cookies, the company was great, take your hat and your coat, sayanora, au revoir, arrivederci. Well played Sharknado 2, well played. Now go and impress your friends with all your Sharknado knowledge.

 

Wise news.

 

S.

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