Getting in touch with your feminine side since 1982

        Is everybody excited for the new lifetime movie “ A Boyfriend for Christmas” !? Slim chance bitch, lifetime is the most hilarious channel on television hands down, over comedy central, over adult swim, this shit has got to be satire, right? Let’s take a shot in the dark here, just a shot, this movie is going to revolve around a healthy mother daughter relationship, or an out of touch dad and his daughter who just doesn’t quite get how to raise a teenage girl. “Its like they’re raising us sometimes”. Should we start with the douche boyfriend, or just skip to the sensitive guy who we DID NOT see eventually getting the girl in the end for his heart and quirky sense of humor. Yawn and a fucking half. Did we tie Christmas in yet? Let me get some awful, just awful, special effects simulating some sort of star happening in the sky at some point. And naturally we’ll include a wish that is said out loud while looking at the sky. Did I even have to say this? And why wouldn’t you be narrating your thoughts aloud while standing in a winter jacket outside with some cute fuzzy earmuffs on? Now don’t forget the wish could be made by the window while one of her legs is bent up, they’re never just sitting in a regular damn chair. Fifty bucks says right after she makes the wish or sees the star, someone goes “ Hey are you ready to go?” or “ Haley, dinners ready!” and the main character turns around promptly and goes away from the camera. Like am I writing this badboy or what? We didn’t delve into the douche boyfriend yet, so lets just touch on that. This guys handsome, and has done a lot of the right things, but he only does them on his terms, she thinks she’s happy because he wears a letterman, but she’s blinded by his status. When really the guy who’s going to treat her right has been right in front of her the whole time <3. Be sure to tune in Saturday November 17th on lifetime to catch this heartfelt pearl of a movie! Stay Wise people.